11 Texting Mistakes That Will Make You Look Dumb in 2023
Don't let your texting skills make you look embarrassed.
Communicating with others has always been fraught, and technology has made it more frequent but not necessarily easier. If you find that you're texting more and more and wondering if you're doing it right, you're not alone. The Washington Post recently consulted Michelle Markowitz, co-author of Hey Ladies!, a book about group texts, and Lizzie Post, great-great-granddaughter of America's first etiquette expert, Emily Post, for their advice. These are 11 texting mistakes that will make you look (or feel) dumb in 2023.
"The 'this should have been a phone call' thinking is over,'" says the Washington Post, noting that Markowitz "loves writing and reading long messages."
"You wouldn't invite a bunch of friends to your house and not introduce them, so don't do that in a group text, either," Markowitz advises. "Take a moment at the top to let everyone say their names and clarify how they know each other.
"If you need to iron something out with a particular group member, start a new text conversation instead of making everyone read your back-and-forth," she says.
"Planning a weekend getaway or fancy dinner in the group chat sounds like fun, but some recipients might be squirming if they don't want to shell out for the Michelin-starred farm-to-table extravaganza." Make space so people can feel comfortable declining an expensive activity.
For good or for ill, sloppy punctuation or writing in all-lower-case is standard procedure these days. It doesn't mean the texter has any less respect for you.
If someone doesn't reply to your text right away, cut them some slack: It's been a rough couple of years. "Keep in mind that plenty of texts get lost to busyness or brain fog, and if you really need an answer, send a kind follow-up," the Post advises.
On the other side of the coin, a text that sits for a long time can cause the sender to worry, and it becomes more difficult to follow up. If you can't write a detailed response immediately, it's good form to send a quick acknowledgment—even an exclamation mark or smiley face.
It's good manners to hold up your side of the conversation. Being overly terse may be seen as rude or "immature"—justifiably. Do the best you can to match your conversation partner's energy.
It's essential to be a good listener. But if you're not sure where someone's coming from, don't just stay silent. "If you're struggling to interpret someone's tone or understand what they said, ask. Reading tone in written communication is hard, and it's always okay to ask for clarification," the Post says.
Passing along very bad news—such as a breakup or someone's death—by text is a no-go.
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Tapping away at your phone in certain real-life environments is still a "Putting your phone away for meals, movies, performances and conversations with loved ones shows people you value them."