7 Best Ways to Stop Worrying About People You Can't Control, According to Best-Selling Author

If we could control everything that happens in our life, we'd eliminate many problems. But the reality is, we can't control our other people. We can't control traffic. We can't control the weather, our loved ones getting sick, or many other things.

It's frustrating, but learning we can't control the world around us. Only our reaction can help offer peace of mind, which is what Mel Robbins, a best-selling author, is helping to convey with the "let them" theory. Read on to learn how to use it to experience peace.

After sharing the theory, Robbins stated on her website that it went "crazy viral" with 15 million views and 11,000 comments. So what is this mindset people can't get enough of? "Let Them" do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life," she stated.

In an Instagram post, the author raved about how much she "absolutely loves" the theory. Robbins did a quick clip that explains how cleansing it can be. "Stop wasting energy on trying to get other people to meet YOUR expectations," she wrote. 

In the IG video, Robbins emphasized how trying to change people is never the solution. "If somebody you're dating or who's a friend, somebody you're trying to partner with in business—if they are not showing up how you need them to show up, do not try to force them to change."

"Let them be themselves," Robbins said on Instagram. "They are revealing who they are to you. Just let them, and then you get to choose what you do next."

"I've been using this technique for a while, so I know firsthand how powerful it is," she stated. In podcast episode 70, where she talked about "let them," she said, "It's the most liberating mindset flip you could ever know."

In the podcast episode, Robbins gave an example of applying the theory to a personal experience. She shared that her son was going to prom and that her family attended a pre-prom photo shoot with friends beforehand. She went on to say that she learned the kids didn't have dinner reservations there, which drove her into overdrive trying to find a restaurant. Her anxiety kicked in when the high schoolers expressed interest in attending a small taco stand with only six seats.

"There are 20 kids in tuxedos and long dresses, dressed to the nines. It is a torrential downpour outside, and their plans for prom are to go to a fast casual joint in the center of town." She admitted that she "immediately started in " saying they couldn't go there. It was when Robbins' daughter told her to let them be and that it was their prom, not hers, she backed off and let it go. 

We can all tend to overstep and get involved when we shouldn't. Even Robbins admitted on the episode she can be that person. "I am controlling." However, she explained how "let them" has helped her let the current of what's happening take place instead of interfering.

"What happens when you adopt the "let them" theory is that you are able to catch yourself when you're controlling people and you don't need to be." 

It's hurtful when you don't feel included, but Robbins explained how "let them" helps. "Have you ever been in a situation where a bunch of your friends go away for the weekend and you're not included?" she asked. "It stings."

While you can justify why you weren't invited, it hurts. "If they're going on a golfing trip for four, let them," she said. 'If a bunch of couples are going away, let them."